discerning others' needs

©2020 dan bulkley | ask@lifechurchco.com

discerning other’s needs

People are in need matthew 9:36 , but how are we to act, speak and even think in a way that meets their needs? We are not supposed to even speak unless it is to the benefit of our hearers according to their needs ephesians 4:29 . We are to be very careful how we live so as to make the most of the opportunities to minister the Gospel to the needs of those around us ephesians 5:15-16 . So, we must learn this grace of discernment of other’s needs so that we may be able to help meet their need with Jesus colossians 4:5-6 . Our goal must be that of building others up in Christ rather than worrying about ourselves romans 14:17-19 luke 12:22 so that through our mutual fellowship i thessalonians 5:11 Christ would recognizably fill all our needs. Needs are different for each soul’s situation and the heart’s particular struggle; so, we must walk by faith not stubbornly doing what we always do but rather meeting each need with the appropriate fulfillment i thessalonians 5:14 .

supporting scriptures

matthew 9:36

When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.

ephesians 4:29

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

ephesians 5:15-16

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.

colossians 4:5-6

Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. 6 Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.

romans 14:17-19

For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. 19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.

luke 12:22

And he said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on.

i thessalonians 5:11

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

i thessalonians 5:14

And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.

It is not our wisdom or insight that gives us the ability to help people and meet their needs daniel 2:27-30 5:14 , but it is Jesus Who is our Need-Meeter hebrews 7:26 . That is why it is so vitally important that we walk with Him by the Holy Spirit i corinthians 2:15-16 because it is the truly spiritual who get to rejoice and participate in the filling of other’s needs galatians 6:1 . Though our own experiences jeremiah 8:4-7 and observations proverbs 24:32 can be helpful it is the Holy Spirit through His Word that actually gives us the Truth and therefore imparts wisdom and understanding to help others job 32:7-9 .

supporting scriptures

daniel 2:27-30

Daniel answered the king and said, “No wise men, enchanters, magicians, or astrologers can show to the king the mystery that the king has asked, 28 but there is a God in heaven who reveals mysteries, and he has made known to King Nebuchadnezzar what will be in the latter days. Your dream and the visions of your head as you lay in bed are these: 29 To you, O king, as you lay in bed came thoughts of what would be after this, and he who reveals mysteries made known to you what is to be. 30 But as for me, this mystery has been revealed to me, not because of any wisdom that I have more than all the living, but in order that the interpretation may be made known to the king, and that you may know the thoughts of your mind.

daniel 5:14

I have heard of you that the spirit of the gods is in you, and that light and understanding and excellent wisdom are found in you.

hebrews 7:26

For it was indeed fitting that we should have such a high priest, holy, innocent, unstained, separated from sinners, and exalted above the heavens.

i corinthians 2:15-16

The spiritual person judges all things, but is himself to be judged by no one. 16 “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ.

galatians 6:1

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.

jeremiah 8:4-7

“You shall say to them, Thus says the Lord: When men fall, do they not rise again? If one turns away, does he not return?

5 Why then has this people turned away in perpetual backsliding? They hold fast to deceit; they refuse to return.

6 I have paid attention and listened, but they have not spoken rightly; no man relents of his evil, saying, ‘What have I done?’ Everyone turns to his own course, like a horse plunging headlong into battle.

7 Even the stork in the heavens knows her times, and the turtledove, swallow, and crane keep the time of their coming, but my people know not the rules of the Lord.

proverbs 24:32

Then I saw and considered it; I looked and received instruction.

job 32:7-9

I said, ‘Let days speak, and many years teach wisdom.’

8 But it is the spirit in man, the breath of the Almighty, that makes him understand.

9 It is not the old who are wise, nor the aged who understand what is right.

In the making the most of an opportunity to help and benefit another, we must remember that all good and perfect things are from the Lord james 1:17 . We are merely His tool isaiah 10:15 to do good to others hosea 11:4 . As such, we do not know how to do good, but He knows how to use us for the benefit of others and His glory i kings 3:9 . If we do our own thing, God will still use us proverbs 16:4 and accomplish His goal esther 4:13-14 ; but if we want to enjoy others and share in God’s glory in them, we must make ourselves available as tools for noble purposes rather than ignoble ii timothy 2:20-21 . We must follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit by faithfully doing what He says in His Word john 16:13 17:17 .

supporting scriptures

james 1:17

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

isaiah 10:15

Shall the axe boast over him who hews with it, or the saw magnify itself against him who wields it? As if a rod should wield him who lifts it, or as if a staff should lift him who is not wood!

hosea 11:4

I led them with cords of kindness, with the bands of love, and I became to them as one who eases the yoke on their jaws, and I bent down to them and fed them.

i kings 3:9

Give your servant therefore an understanding mind to govern your people, that I may discern between good and evil, for who is able to govern this your great people?”

proverbs 16:4

The Lord has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble.

esther 4:13-14

Then Mordecai told them to reply to Esther, “Do not think to yourself that in the king’s palace you will escape any more than all the other Jews. 14 For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father’s house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?”

ii timothy 2:20-21

Now in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and clay, some for honorable use, some for dishonorable. 21 Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work.

john 16:13

Now in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and clay, some for honorable use, some for dishonorable. 21 Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work.

john 17:17

Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth.

Though true discernment to meet needs is only through the Holy Spirit, we should not assume that our mind must disengage and ignore the information we can gather about a person from various sources proverbs 15:14 i corinthians 14:14-20 .

ny notes:

supporting scriptures

proverbs 15:14

The heart of him who has understanding seeks knowledge,

but the mouths of fools feed on folly.

i corinthians 14:14-20

For if I pray in a tongue, my spirit prays but my mind is unfruitful. 15 What am I to do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will pray with my mind also; I will sing praise with my spirit, but I will sing with my mind also. 16 Otherwise, if you give thanks with your spirit, how can anyone in the position of an outsider say “Amen” to your thanksgiving when he does not know what you are saying? 17 For you may be giving thanks well enough, but the other person is not being built up. 18 I thank God that I speak in tongues more than all of you. 19 Nevertheless, in church I would rather speak five words with my mind in order to instruct others, than ten thousand words in a tongue.

20 Brothers, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature.

learn from:

God’s descriptions and instructions that apply to a person.

ii timothy 2:7

supporting scriptures

ii timothy 2:7

Think over what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything.

learn from:

a person’s own words. matthew 12:34

supporting scriptures

matthew 12:34

You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.

learn from:

a person’s actions and reactions matthew 7:16-27

supporting scriptures

matthew 7:16-27

You will recognize them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17 So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit. 18 A healthy tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a diseased tree bear good fruit. 19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. 20 Thus you will recognize them by their fruits.

21 “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22 On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ 23 And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’

24 “Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. 26 And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. 27 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.”

my notes

learn from:

a person’s tone and cultural context i kings 18:27

supporting scriptures

i kings 18:27

And at noon Elijah mocked them, saying, “Cry aloud, for he is a god. Either he is musing, or he is relieving himself, or he is on a journey, or perhaps he is asleep and must be awakened.”

learn from:

even a person’s facial expressions.

isaiah 3:9 genesis 4:6

supporting scriptures

isaiah 3:9

For the look on their faces bears witness against them;

they proclaim their sin like Sodom;

they do not hide it.

Woe to them!

For they have brought evil on themselves.

genesis 4:6

The Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen?

my notes:

learn from:

a person’s reputation.

acts 6:3 proverbs 22:1 i timothy 5:9-10

supporting scriptures

acts 6:3

Therefore, brothers, pick out from among you seven men of good repute, full of the Spirit and of wisdom, whom we will appoint to this duty.

proverbs 22:1

A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches, and favor is better than silver or gold.

i timothy 5:9-10

Let a widow be enrolled if she is not less than sixty years of age, having been the wife of one husband, 10 and having a reputation for good works: if she has brought up children, has shown hospitality, has washed the feet of the saints, has cared for the afflicted, and has devoted herself to every good work.

learn from:

a combination of many information sources

proverbs 28:11 .

my notes:

supporting scriptures

proverbs 28:11

A rich man is wise in his own eyes, but a poor man who has understanding will find him out.

Be careful that in your discernment that you do not act merely on your own judgement proverbs 20:18 , expectations and biases ii corinthians 10:7 , limited insight isaiah 11:3 john 7:24 or by rash, fleshly observations ii corinthians 5:7 . We help by faith not by our own insight, and so we must respond to a person’s needs not from a worldly point of view but rather by the grace of God ii corinthians 5:16 . We must continually and perpetually judge and correct our own actions, words, intent, motives, etc. by God’s Word ii corinthians 1:20 ii corinthians 13:5 ii corinthians 11:31 matthew 7:1-5 if we are to be confident that we are actually helping and not hurting others luke 11:23 .

supporting scriptures

proverbs 20:18

Whoever walks in integrity will be delivered, but he who is crooked in his ways will suddenly fall.

ii corinthians 10:7

Look at what is before your eyes. If anyone is confident that he is Christ’s, let him remind himself that just as he is Christ’s, so also are we.

isaiah 11:3

And his delight shall be in the fear of the Lord. He shall not judge by what his eyes see, or decide disputes by what his ears hear.

john 7:24

Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.

ii corinthians 5:7

for we walk by faith, not by sight.

ii corinthians 5:16

From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer.

ii corinthians 1:20

For all the promises of God find their Yes in him. That is why it is through him that we utter our Amen to God for his glory.

ii corinthians 13:5

Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test!

ii corinthians 11:31

The God and Father of the Lord Jesus, he who is blessed forever, knows that I am not lying.

matthew 7:1-5

“Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. 3 Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

luke 11:23

Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.

If we desire to participate in the Lord’s blessedness by helping others acts 20:34-35 in their true needs then we must do as He instructs:

supporting scriptures

acts 20:34-35

You yourselves know that these hands ministered to my necessities and to those who were with me. 35 In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”

follow His Word

psalm 111:10 119:100

supporting scriptures

psalm 111:10

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom;

all those who practice it have a good understanding.

His praise endures forever!

psalm 119:100

I understand more than the aged,

for I keep your precepts.

speak the Truth in love.

ephesians 4:15

my notes:

supporting scriptures

ephesians 4:15

Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.

practice, exercise, practice doing what He says.

hebrews 5:11-14

supporting scriptures

hebrews 5:11-14

About this we have much to say, and it is hard to explain, since you have become dull of hearing. 12 For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of the oracles of God. You need milk, not solid food, 13 for everyone who lives on milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, since he is a child. 14 But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.

continue walking in His ways.

hosea 14:9

supporting scriptures

hosea 14:9

Whoever is wise, let him understand these things; whoever is discerning, let him know them; for the ways of the Lord are right, and the upright walk in them, but transgressors stumble in them.

devote yourself to doing good in EVERY facet of your life.

titus 3:1-8

supporting scriptures

titus 3:1-8

Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, 2 to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. 3 For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. 4 But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, 5 he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, 6 whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. 8 The saying is trustworthy, and I want you to insist on these things, so that those who have believed in God may be careful to devote themselves to good works. These things are excellent and profitable for people.

For true insight and discernment in your own life and truly helping others is in doing what God commands i chronicles 22:12 i john 5:1-3 . There is no harm but rather help and good coming from those who live producing that which is only from the Spirit galatians 5:22-23 romans 13:8 . Do not fear if you feel like a failure or if people do not recognize what you do as good galatians 1:10 ; for if you do as God says you can rest assured that even in your limitations, frailty and weakness the Lord does good before you get there and after you’ve been there for He walks with you isaiah 58:6-8 .

supporting scriptures

i chronicles 22:12

Only, may the Lord grant you discretion and understanding, that when he gives you charge over Israel you may keep the law of the Lord your God.

i john 5:1-3

Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. 2 By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. 3 For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.

galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

romans 13:8

Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.

galatians 1:10

For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.

my notes:

isaiah 58:6-8

“Is not this the fast that I choose: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the straps of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free,

and to break every yoke?

7 Is it not to share your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house;] when you see the naked, to cover him, and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?

8 Then shall your light break forth like the dawn, and your healing shall spring up speedily; your righteousness shall go before you; the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard.

People are known by their actions and words proverbs 20:11 matthew 12:33-37 . No, we ourselves cannot actually know an individual’s heart. Only God knows the heart i kings 8:39 jeremiah 17:9 , but He reveals another’s NEED to those who are walking with the Spirit by sincerely following the Word i corinthians 4:5 galatians 6:1 how to best help the other person proverbs 16:1 .

supporting scriptures

proverbs 20:11

Even a child makes himself known by his acts, by whether his conduct is pure and upright.

matthew 12:33-37

“Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad, for the tree is known by its fruit. 34 You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. 35 The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. 36 I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, 37 for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

i kings 8:39

then hear in heaven your dwelling place and forgive and act and render to each whose heart you know, according to all his ways (for you, you only, know the hearts of all the children of mankind)

jeremiah 17:9

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?

i corinthians 4:5

Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.

galatians 6:1

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.

proverbs 16:1

The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.

How does one put to practice Biblically discerning other’s needs? We must put the wisdom of God to use so as to discern what is best in any given situation philippians 1:9-11 . Not that we should ever think more highly of ourselves than we ought romans 12:3 , for discernment is a matter of helping others not self-esteem colossians 2:18 ii corinthians 10:18 james 3:13 . Insight for pride’s sake makes a fool of the puffed up soul proverbs 28:5 18:12 i corinthians 3:19 while simple love for God builds up everyone i corinthians 8:1-3 .

my notes:

supporting scriptures

philippians 1:9-11

And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, 10 so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, 11 filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

romans 12:3

For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.

colossians 2:18

Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind.

ii corinthians 10:18

For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.

james 3:13

Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom.

proverbs 28:5

Evil men do not understand justice, but those who seek the Lord understand it completely.

proverbs 18:12

Before destruction a man’s heart is haughty, but humility comes before honor.

i corinthians 3:19

For the wisdom of this world is folly with God. For it is written, “He catches the wise in their craftiness,”

i corinthians 8:1-3

Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that “all of us possess knowledge.” This “knowledge” puffs up, but love builds up. 2 If anyone imagines that he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. 3 But if anyone loves God, he is known by God.

If we are truly to have the insight given by God to do the right thing for another not necessarily understand a person’s heart we must do as God says for He alone knows what another needs. A person with God’s understanding draws another’s heart’s need to the surface proverbs 20:5 :

supporting scriptures

proverbs 20:5

The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.

pray for insight and understanding from God

psalm 119:33-36

supporting scriptures

psalm 119:33-36

Teach me, O Lord, the way of your statutes; and I will keep it to the end.

34 Give me understanding, that I may keep your law and observe it with my whole heart.

35 Lead me in the path of your commandments, for I delight in it.

36 Incline my heart to your testimonies, and not to selfish gain!

earnestly seek God’s knowledge, wisdom and understanding .

proverbs 2:1-10

supporting scriptures

proverbs 2:1-10

My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you,

2 making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding;

3 yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding,

4 if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures,

5 then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.

6 For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding;

7 he stores up sound wisdom for the upright; he is a shield to those who walk in integrity,

8 guarding the paths of justice and watching over the way of his saints.

9 Then you will understand righteousness and justice and equity, every good path;

10 for wisdom will come into your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul;

seek to understand more than to be understood.

proverbs 18:2

my notes:

supporting scriptures

proverbs 18:2

A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.

humbly open your heart to others rather than isolating yourself.

proverbs 18:1 ii corinthians 6:11

supporting scriptures

proverbs 18:1

Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.

ii corinthians 6:11

We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open.

intently listen and ask questions so that which is spoken can be weighed and responded to in a beneficial way

proverbs 18:13 proverbs 18:17 james 1:19
i corinthians 14:29 proverbs 15:28

supporting scriptures

proverbs 18:13

If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.

proverbs 18:17

The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.

james 1:19

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;

i corinthians 14:29

Let two or three prophets speak, and let the others weigh what is said.

proverbs 15:28

The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer,but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.

test and observe a person in shrewd, harmless and beneficial ways

ii corinthians 2:9 i thessalonians 5:21 i timothy 3:10 matthew 10:16 i chronicles 29:17 ii chronicles 32:31 proverbs 28:11

supporting scriptures

ii corinthians 2:9

For this is why I wrote, that I might test you and know whether you are obedient in everything.

i thessalonians 5:21

but test everything; hold fast what is good.

i timothy 3:10

And let them also be tested first; then let them serve as deacons if they prove themselves blameless.

matthew 10:16

“Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.”

i chronicles 29:17

I know, my God, that you test the heart and have pleasure in uprightness. In the uprightness of my heart I have freely offered all these things, and now I have seen your people, who are present here, offering freely and joyously to you.

ii chronicles 32:31

And so in the matter of the envoys of the princes of Babylon, who had been sent to him to inquire about the sign that had been done in the land, God left him to himself, in order to test him and to know all that was in his heart.

proverbs 28:11

A rich man is wise in his own eyes, but a poor man who has understanding will find him out.

go back to the Word and rightly describe and prescribe to the need

ii timothy 2:15 i corinthians 4:6

supporting scriptures

ii timothy 2:15

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.

i corinthians 4:6

I have applied all these things to myself and Apollos for your benefit, brothers, that you may learn by us not to go beyond what is written, that none of you may be puffed up in favor of one against another.

We all know about encouraging, being kind, giving and generally doing nice things out of love for God and others, but that is not always what is needed for different soul struggles, so other approaches must be taken because we are to address the need not the desire (Isaiah 30:10-11, Jeremiah 23:14). Here are several examples from Scripture of meeting what a person needs which is contrary to conventional-Christian thinking and/or is atypical and yet is still God’s gracious love because that is what that soul and other souls needed.

sharp rebuke

titus 1:13

supporting scriptures

titus 1:13

This testimony is true. Therefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith.

removing from fellowship

i corinthians 5:13

supporting scriptures

i corinthians 5:13

God judges those outside. “Purge the evil person from among you.”

my notes:

public disgrace

matthew 18:15-17 ii timothy 2:20-21

supporting scriptures

matthew 18:15-17

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

ii timothy 2:20-21

Now in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood and clay, some for honorable use, some for dishonorable. 21 Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the master of the house, ready for every good work.

public confrontation

galatians 2:14

supporting scriptures

galatians 2:14

But when I saw that their conduct was not in step with the truth of the gospel, I said to Cephas before them all, “If you, though a Jew, live like a Gentile and not like a Jew, how can you force the Gentiles to live like Jews?”

my notes:


ii thessalonians 3:14

supporting scriptures

ii thessalonians 3:14

If anyone does not obey what we say in this letter, take note of that person, and have nothing to do with him, that he may be ashamed.

physical discipline

proverbs 13:24

supporting scriptures

proverbs 13:24

Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.


romans 16:17-18

supporting scriptures

romans 16:17-18

I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them. 18 For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites, and by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naive.

my notes:

hand over to satan

i corinthians 5:5

supporting scriptures

i corinthians 5:5

you are to deliver this man to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord.

not rescuing

proverbs 19:19

supporting scriptures

proverbs 19:19

A man of great wrath will pay the penalty,for if you deliver him, you will only have to do it again.

my notes:

not giving anything

luke 15:16-17

supporting scriptures

luke 15:16-17

And he was longing to be fed with the pods that the pigs ate, and no one gave him anything.

17 “But when he came to himself, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have more than enough bread, but I perish here with hunger!

my notes: